Stick that in your pipe and smoke it

Thursday, August 17, 2006

Guess who's back, mushrooms back...

To the lady on Victoria Road earlier this week that decided that it would be wise to wee in their lunch box before getting on the bus, I thank you.

Ever since this incident I feel like i have undergone some sort of personal rennaissance of sorts. The details were brilliant, the fact that people were crowded around you oblivious to the fact that you had just pulled down you pants and were rummaging around in your bag for something. The fact that when the bus showed up you were midstream and decided to jettison said urine from lunchbox onto adjacent office window......I know there is a desk right there too. I dont know how you made it onto the bus with that lunch box but here's to you.

Never in my wildest dreams did I imagine that I would witness such a spectacle on my journey from the building, normally its the same mundane routine. You see routine bores me, I like the unexpected to happen. It makes my day.

I was feeling beaten down by the oppression of responsibility and repetitiveness and then BANG you showed me that it can happen. You see anything can and will happen and it is only limited by our limited ability to conjur the unthinkable. The possibilities are in fact BOUNDLESS.

Piss lady, thankyou and good luck with your journey.

46 Comments:

  • Well, you're welcome.

    By Blogger essa, at 8:57 PM  

  • OMG i knew it was you lol

    By Blogger mushroom, at 9:20 PM  

  • Oh that is so very cool, 'shroom!

    But do tell: was this woman homeless? white trash? wannabe yuppie? of an age where incontinance is excusable?

    I have to complete the mental picture...

    By Blogger Mountjoy, at 9:42 PM  

  • And are you sure it wasn't Fingers in drag??

    By Blogger MissShroom, at 9:45 PM  

  • Classy. I like her style.

    By Blogger Steph, at 5:45 AM  

  • hi shroom! see you on Mystical's blog from time to time. My ex boyfriend took a poo in someone's yard one time. You woulda loved him!

    By Blogger JLee, at 2:15 PM  

  • Grandma has been known to squat in very public places (in the past) in order to squeeze a kidney, but she's never done the lunchbox trick!

    By Blogger Jin, at 5:31 AM  

  • Er... not while I'm having a coffee!

    By Blogger ChickyBabe, at 4:51 PM  

  • My sister once witnessed a woman on thebus from South Coogee to Bondi Junction take down her tracky dacks and do a poo on the seat. Noice.

    By Blogger Georgia, at 10:52 PM  

  • I worked with a guy whose girlfriend peed in the pot plant outside their apaprtment once simply because her boyfriend couldn't find his keys straight away, and she had to go. And no, she wasn't drunk and didn't have incontinance problems. She was just a trashbag.

    By Blogger Original Mel, at 3:25 PM  

  • May i say on behalf of all men, the world is our urinal haha

    By Blogger mushroom, at 4:46 PM  

  • Nothing as unexpected as seeing a chick piss in her lunch box has EVER happened to me. She sounds like a real catch, did you get her number?

    By Blogger Odly Amore, at 6:40 PM  

  • ewwww, horrific.

    The only acceptable reasons for public urination is kids (preferably boys) who need to find a tree, and quickly.

    or drunken men who find an alleyway.

    Lunchbox? ugh! women!? UGH!

    Welcome back !

    By Blogger Ms Smack, at 8:45 PM  

  • What the hell? How come I wasn't there to witness that. Why didn't she just piss on the ground? Why piss on her sammich? So many questions, too many laughs.

    By Blogger Blonde Vigilante, at 7:26 AM  

  • I would have loved to of watched this. Your lucky mushroom, I need something exciting to happen around me. :)
    LMAO!! Take care sweetie!! XOXO

    By Blogger Mystical Me, at 9:02 AM  

  • So what do you want me to say?

    By Blogger killerrabbit, at 3:59 PM  

  • Say sorry to the bus driver and everyone else who saw you do it KR.

    By Blogger mushroom, at 4:56 PM  

  • Hi Shroom! Nice blog.

    Hee. You said piss.

    By Blogger Chesty LaRue, at 5:05 PM  

  • I actually like that lunchbox image you've got there shroom. It's kinda green. And asian -looking.

    By Blogger actonb, at 5:05 PM  

  • So he did LaRue.
    teeheehee.
    I got an email this morning, from a customer, regretting the 'incontinence'... hahaha.

    By Blogger actonb, at 5:08 PM  

  • Lunchboxes are sooo 1990's. Plastic bags is where the lunch-carrying trade is heading.

    By Blogger Chesty LaRue, at 5:09 PM  

  • LOLZ!!!1!

    Did the incontincence happen during a meeting, or was he just sending the email to everyone?

    By Blogger Chesty LaRue, at 5:10 PM  

  • If only...
    obviously he meant inconvenience. but he's italian you know, maybe it all means the same in his native tongue...

    By Blogger actonb, at 5:12 PM  

  • Well, some people do refer to loos as 'conveniences' ... so maybe it all does mean the same thing. He was inconvenient. And so peed in a lunchbox.

    By Blogger Chesty LaRue, at 5:14 PM  

  • I'll tell you what's bloody inconvenient... damn blogger and it's inability to upload photos.

    By Blogger actonb, at 5:15 PM  

  • I know. It's fucked.

    I mean ... it's lovely. I heart blogger. HEARTS!

    Blogger is hott.

    By Blogger Chesty LaRue, at 5:19 PM  

  • I think double-consonanting things is so 1980s advertising-mogul.

    By Blogger actonb, at 5:23 PM  

  • It's so nott. It's hott. It's cool. You're just not cool, AB.

    By Blogger Chesty LaRue, at 5:32 PM  

  • And your point is...?

    Worked out what has given me the 'asian' feeling re lunchbox - the spoon. it's a dead giveaway.

    By Blogger actonb, at 5:34 PM  

  • It's a really unattractive lunchbx.

    But that may be because I'm just imaginging someone peeing in it. And it has that off-white toilet colour.

    By Blogger Chesty LaRue, at 5:37 PM  

  • 100 comments here we come. thanks girls....

    By Blogger mushroom, at 5:39 PM  

  • You jinxed it, shrooms.

    By Blogger Chesty LaRue, at 6:00 PM  

  • Are you feeling loved enough yet?

    By Blogger actonb, at 6:06 PM  

  • Ewww shroom, that is gross.

    By Blogger W, at 6:41 PM  

  • Thanks W, i aim to disgust.

    I can hear C&C Music Factory singing "Things that make you go ewww"

    By Blogger mushroom, at 7:04 PM  

  • Incontincence is Inconvenient.

    By Blogger Mountjoy, at 7:21 PM  

  • Ewww I once had a homeless chick take a dump behind my car in a carpark. When I went to move the car, she got up me because she was leaning against it.

    By Blogger evil genius, at 7:46 PM  

  • At my old office in Sydney, the moron receptiomist sent an email around about some fuck-up with the mail and ended it with the words: "Sorry for any incontinence." Bless her.

    By Blogger Georgia, at 8:53 PM  

  • Mushroom seems to have people toiletting around him often. A guy took a dump in the tube of his senior school certificate and the wipe his ass WITH the certificate, then left it on the bonnet of his car. If Mushrooms school lunch box was there I'm sure that would have been peed in too :)

    By Blogger MissShroom, at 4:38 PM  

  • I hope she took out her sandwich first. Nobody likes soggy bread.

    By Blogger Polyman2, at 1:59 PM  

  • Are you taking the piss, mushroom?

    By Blogger welcome to wallyworld, at 1:45 PM  

  • I reckon if you never do another post, this'll get to 100 comments eventually, as people start to talk among themselves, free from the shackles of having to comment on a post ...

    By Blogger Chesty LaRue, at 4:12 PM  

  • Post from Toronto, ON...
    Okay this is just too funny.. I have to say this is the first global "piss in lunchbox" story I have heard of. Gave me a great laugh shrooms... Thank you from Canada

    By Blogger Peep, at 7:11 PM  

  • Dont you have a photophone?

    Sheesh! An image would have been fantastic.

    By Blogger Ms Smack, at 6:38 PM  

  • Ms Smack, you know me too well. I was struggling to get the phone out as she stepped onto the bus.

    By Blogger mushroom, at 12:03 AM  

  • the chicklet seys.if nature calls, sumtimes she tends to scream.speaking of personal experience.me and the potplant.note ws left afterwards*needed water*lmfao!drip dry!

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 3:26 AM  

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